There came a point in life where David Hojak was at his absolute lowest… to start, an ex-girlfriend was covering rent for him in a roommate situation that she‘d found. She’d also helped me leave Baja (Mexico), where I stayed with someone who proved themselves dishonest. Nonetheless, after traveling from Texas to Baja, then from Baja to Los Angeles, I was exhausted.

… and so were those assisting me. That same ex-girlfriend, whom I still love deeply & regard tremendously, helped me more in those moments than anyone had. She ultimately supported furthering my own closeness to my wife… which involved helping me get from ‘Point A’ to ‘Point E’ (literally) throughout a geographical rescue effort that was multi-stop. If not for her, I’d have never made it to the woman I’ve married in the end. Having been the first to witness my heart stopping, she’s probably one of the most loyal people I’ve ever known. With my wife actually being the second to witness such a thing, then for wife to see it worsen… I never thought I’d be where I am now.

I was summoned by an acquaintance based on my experience to help another, so I left Texas. Headed for Baja, I hopped on a train from Texas, intending to stay with a guy I’d never met. He was offering me a profit sharing opportunity to help him “develop a company.”

He asked me to come stay with him for five or six months. It worked for me, since it was time for me to venture forth & see new parts of the world… as well as helping him. I figured I’d go with it… pay heed to the opportunity set before me, take advantage of geographical “perks” while on-location & go from there.

Come to think of it…… while in Baja, I didn’t see much of it before relocating & ultimately being rescued, just in time.

Don’t get me wrong…… what I saw of Rosarito was beautiful. Baja is a beautiful part of land, no matter who it “belongs to”… and it’s there to be enjoyed by everyone. The beach just south of the California state line was gorgeous. The view of it was immaculate. My only disturbance was the secretive, indecisive and obsessively insecure roommate I’d somehow now inherited. And again, don’t misinterpret my faith-driven trust as ignorance…… but this man had honestly presented himself as much more capable & talented than he really was. Like, WOW, bro.

Maaaaaaaaaaaan, did I make a mistake.

When “Sack-Lick” picked me up from the train station in Oceanside to start our “business venture,” it became instantly obvious… beginning with the way he struggled to shift his car back into “Drive.” This guy couldn’t pour water out of a boot if it had instructions on the heel. I ended up at a place he’d rented alongside “roommates” that I never visually confirmed the existence of. Nothing constructive or creative came from him for hours, then days, then weeks. For almost a month, he took phone calls behind closed doors, wandered his hallways & hid in his bedroom.

We talked briefly on only a few occasions. I spent most of my time there looking out at the Pacific Ocean, which I loved. In swift time, it occurred to me… this was one o’ those guys who’d rented a room, occasionally socialized & got imaginative while “high.” He hid from responsibility, then made an excuse & admitted failure only to himself. Lastly, he had the budget to chalk it up to “another one biting the dust”… if even to the tune of everyone else’s loss, and his own lack of anything. I just couldn’t do it… so I left after a month. He wanted me to do all his work, then pay him for it as part of an “agreement.” F♠♣♥♦♠♣♥♦♠♣♥♦CK THAT.

At that point, the only affordable souvenirs for me there were pictures I could take. While there, I nabbed just a few. I never wandered on down to the Mexican coast on my own. It wasn’t a lack of courage or anything, truthfully… it was just too darn far to walk, and I didn’t want to ask Mr. Uselessness for something so recreational. He wasn’t even capable of gathering resources or contacts to get started on the work he’d brought me there for… let alone, actually shift his automobile into “Drive” & go somewhere. Truthfully, though his ass was actually somewhat fat, I never visually confirmed that he consumed food.

I couldn’t have ever imagined I’d be where I was, right then. Back then, my perspectives has shifted entirely. Nowadays, it directly opposes where I was just a decade and a half ago. Back then, so many problems… to start, I was being repeatedly hospitalized. No treatments worked. Visit after visit, appointment after appointment, new medicine after new medicine.

Now, alongside a woman who makes me happier than I’d ever otherwise be, a friend I’ve had since childhood… I feel more supported, more thoroughly “backed-up,” than I have since I had living family. I’m actually HEALTHIER now. Nearly two generations later, all the family that’s actually alive & willing to claim me, won’t even “say ‘hi’” anymore…… and I don’t care. Fµck ’em. They’re the ones missing out, not me. As long as I have my wife, I have everything I’ll ever need from anyone.

She truly is, through and through, my best & most understanding friend.

During your own lifelong journey, distractions will provoke you. Allies alongside you, at all points, are capable of deterring you from your goals, your own “destination.” MOST of them have their own in mind, make no mistake about it. To them, though you can periodically align alongside them conveniently, nothing is long-term… not even in “committed relationships.” In this era, we are each other’s expense. We exist alongside each other as an extension of liability for mistakes we didn’t make… if even only to recover from crises that ever-so-momentarily financially paralyze us. In this era, love as well as living are an optimally packaged deal.

Though it can defy conventional religious teachings… truth told, too much diversity now roams our planet freely, to expect them all to acknowledge one “god.” Society, to me, looks like they have no idea what to acknowledge at this point. The safest & most redeeming thing you can do is acknowledge those who are most important to you. No matter where you are in life, no matter how long you’ve known them… forego details. Let naturalism manifest intellectually & emotionally.

Let your friendship with your “closest chosen” act as the entry-point for them to “come in” and learn you more. Defy your own barriers from within, and be secure enough in your own psychology to share it. Learn what you can from those you sit alongside, with an open mind. Acknowledge your mistakes, and learn from them. Grow with, and through, each other. Whether that growth turns into a friendship, a relationship or an everlasting bond… it has the capacity to influence your own future so greatly.


“It’s just a tumor in my head… and I’m in the dark”

~Chris Cornell