Few will ever have to see their own name on a headstone while alive… least of all, at such a young age.

Imagine that visual, embedded in your mind & doomed to haunt your most subconscious thoughts, so early in life. Some will never know a fraction of that psychological hardship, and God bless them for their blissful ignorance.

As life begins firing fastballs at you so early in its game, it becomes hard to hit them… as they whiz by, confusing you. When young, as these things rain down on you like emotional atomic bombs, everything can become an influence. The door’s wide open. And believe me when I tell you…… they detect it. They sniff it out like bloodhounds.

Susceptibility at your youngest can be difficult to intellectually navigate, which is necessary to succeed such challenges. If you don’t fully understand exactly why you’re acting, or reacting, simply don’t. Neutrality, in so many ways, especially given this generation’s average IQ, is always going to lead to the safest route. Taking stances on anything, even by way of anonymously spoken opinions on the internet, can equal social cataclysm. People these days track IP addresses. They’re desperate for a headline, and they’re always hunting.

I was bullied brutally in 4th grade, and he taught me to defend myself. He tried showing me how to work on cars, but I was more into computers. He wasn’t alive to see my first official amateur martial arts contests, but mom was in her last years here. Watching such loving parents both independently degrade as a result of their vices was crushing to me. It deflated my confidence, it sapped my nerve and it diminished any ego I’d mustered-up by then.

Losing a parent so early in life will teach you a lot about yourself…… not only by way of how quickly you shift into ‘responsible mode’, but how maturely you handle it all. Few successfully make the transition, even after years. At thirteen years old, my challenges were obviously set forth. Within years, I was beyond so many who’d come before me… so many who had no excuse to still be doing so little. I couldn’t believe that my grief, which would strike me down and paralyze me before… was actually urging & driving my ambition now. In his aftermath… If I’d taken the same approach that my elders did, I wouldn’t be nearly as far along. I even have a sibling that’s actively taken after one of them, beyond their guidance by way of examples. It crushes me.

Living life isn’t about sitting inside & reflecting on the past. It’s about getting out there and enjoying what’s presently there, setting up for your future. Appreciate whatever you have and where you can go, when you can. Enjoy it all while it’s there to have fun with. Life won’t stay paused in one frame forever… it never does. Stay ahead of the curves coming at you by patiently & tactically navigating them as precisely as possible… while creating the least amount of friction you can in your efforts.

It’ll never be safe to assume that someone sees things from your perspective outright. Sometimes, patience enough to introduce them to that perspective can go a long way. From there, true communication & comprehension begins. You’ll never truly explain or express yourself to a moron… but enlightening said moron can go lengths of unforeseen measure. Wherever you end up, for as long as you’re there, take it as an opportunity to learn… if not about where you are, then about the people there. Be interested & involved. If anything, it’ll give you something to do, and keep you out of trouble.

Whether presented examples by way of someone else’s experience, or your own, pay attention. Your story doesn’t have to be one of another fallen failure, who “had so much potential.” If necessary, make your own story one like mine will be. Mine will equal random tales of triumph over tribulation, strength throughout struggle, healing while hopeless, authentic abandonment & random rescue.

Let your actions become your aftermath’s tale in the best possible ways. Don’t make the kinds of mistakes that leave your loved ones missing you & wishing you’d “done more.” Recognize your worth to your family & friends, then put your efforts forth. No one who loves you wants to see you fail. When leaned up against a stack of challenges, it’s your burden to become the hired gun, the “completionist.” Do your best while you can, without willfully making mistakes. Get as far as you can. Do it all. Be it all. And be GREAT.

“Remember to forget and then rename your shame…… I wanna make it right.”

~Chris Cornell